faithful

the word "faithful" kept running through my mind last night...i had the priveledge to sit and listen to what the Lord has provided here at WM, what He has done in other people's lives to restore them, and to sing words about his faithfulness and our expectation for that to continue. i believe the word "faithful" kept running through my mind because at times i lose sight of it. i have been known to throw temper tantrums when i want things my way and on my own time, at those moments faithful is not a part of my thinking or vocabulary.
thankfully, His word restores me. I am reading through the old testament and there is no better example of the Lord's faithfulness then some of the stories in the OT. i've kept thinking over and over again about a story in 2 Sam. 12 when the Lord strikes David/Bathsheba's son with illness and plans for him to pass away. why does David pray and fast the whole time and still want to be in communication with God knowing He is going to take his Child? And why...is David okay with the end result of the Lord taking his child from him? i think he knew of the Lord's faithfulness better then any of us. David writes Psalm 51 from this period of time in his life which has been one of my key verses to hold on to. he does ask for the Lord's forgiveness and mercy but he also asks for the Lord to create a pure heart in him, restore the joy of his salvation, to teach him wisdom in the inmost place and a willing spirit to sustain him, for the Lord to not cast him from his presence. more than anything, more than his son, his life, his way David seemed to want to be in the presence of the Lord. he knew of the Lord's faithfulness and did not want to be cast from it. he knew he could bring nothing to the Lord except a broken and contrite heart, perhaps that is what the Lord is working in me?
i hope to continue to think about this in the days to come...to know that He was faithful, He is faithful, and He is faithful to come....